R u m m y   P a r k

b y   R e b e c c a   L u   K i e r n a n


8.  Pivotal

On Halloween you were a rock star
In a red anaconda shirt and gold leather
And I was the secret of bees,
The only thing that could extinguish the old love.
 
Your kiss mashed up my wings
And my Viva-Glam lipstick
In darling diva
Was all over your neck
And you tasted like cotton candy
And you smelled like coconut cake
And when you took my breast out
In the blaze of the buzzing street lamp,
I opened for you right there
And everything was a blur,
Except for your breath on my collarbone,
The tangle of your hair.
 
After, I could have sprung up,
Adjusted my dress
And feigned some
Ladylike shade of embarrassment.
 
But something about
The way you took my hand
While you were still inside me,
I stayed right there
For a few dizzy seconds
And when we stopped spinning,
There was no more pretending
We hadn't crawled
Through the wreckage of the year
To get right to that moment.
 
Now, with raspberry truffles
And Australian champagne
We sprawl out in the shade
Of the cranberry willow,
You tell me the story of how you fell.
 
Seeing me ghost-gray,
Out of love with him,
Holding onto him, closing my eyes,
Trying to turn back time,
Waiting for a ripple in the amnesia,
A miracle, an exorcism,
Packing and unpacking a suitcase.
 
You imagined the sound of my laughter,
Wondering if he ever had heard it.
You saw him open the door for me.
You swear I looked into your eyes.
You say it was so hard not to run to me.
He slammed the door so hard, you flinched
And a dozen bloated crows took flight
Breaking camouflage with this tree
And before I ever spoke
You fell in love with my shadows,
Not my light
Which is, darling,
The better of me.
 
My story of how I fell for you
Goes back to that bench.
We could have dismantled
And called it a wet dream
And crumbled in opposite directions
Casually,
Into the indifference
Of the November rain.
 
But something about the way you took my hand,
We rose and walked seven blocks,
The full circle of Rummy Park
And you carried my suitcase
Weightless like we were on the moon,
Though it was full
Of shark teeth,
Hurricanes,
Scorpions,
Rocks.